December 11, 2005
READING 2: 1 Thessalonians 5:16-24
GOSPEL: John 1:6-8, 19-28
I remember a family wedding when I was quite young and my grandparents seemed very old. They had been married for many years and my grandmother was sickly and my grandfather was very healthy. The wedding was a typically Catholic celebration, with lots of food and drink, dancing and the joy of good memories that comes at family reunions. There was plenty of noise but I heard my grandfather say to my grandmother, “Mae, I am proud of you!” She said, “Speak up, I can’t hear you.” He said a bit louder, “Mae, I am proud of you.” He was a quiet man, and this was typical of the conversations we had heard through the years. But this time, my grandfather spoke about as loud as he could, and ironically, for an odd reason, the noise was low enough for everyone around them to hear, “Mae, I said, I am proud of you!” You could see the sweetness on everyone’s face as they heard him. Then my grandmother said just as loudly, “Oh, I am tired of you too!” Sometimes families get down on themselves. There is so much psycho-babble about functional and dysfunctional families today, it is easy to concentrate on the problems in the family and ignore its many strengths. After the baptism of his baby brother at Mass one Sunday, one of the children sobbed all the way home. His dad asked him what happened. He said, “The priest said Zach would have to be raised by a Christian family that prays at home and I want him to stay with us.” If family members were asked to rate their family’s spirituality, few would give themselves an “A” rating. That’s sad because families need to recognize their own holiness. Spirituality is, after all, allowing the Spirit of God, God’s love, joy and peace, into the reality of our daily lives. We express our love in our families not perfectly, but faithfully. When we are joyful we celebrate together. When we are in crisis, we support one another. When we are hurt or in conflict, we work to heal the rift and the wounds. The Spirit of God is present in the daily effort to be there for one another. Family life can be tiring. But we learn how to be Christian, accepting and loving in spite of everything. John knew himself well. He knew the Messiah was coming and he knew he was not the Messiah. We need to know ourselves as well. We are human beings with limitations, with sins, with a need for forgiveness. This Wednesday evening, we will have the parish Advent reconciliation service. Yesterday we had a funeral for a 41 year old man who took his own life. I’ve known him for 11 years and always considered him a hero. I did a lot of reading, thinking and praying to prepare for this funeral. Through all that I came to believe that every human being, certainly every adult, has secrets. And every human being has a war going on inside because of these secrets. Some of the secrets are small, we don’t think they mean much and there’s not need to share them. Others we keep to ourselves for personal reasons. They may be expectations we have met, things that have happened to us, or things we regret. We don’t share these with our best friend; we don’t share them with our spouse. Sometimes we keep them to ourselves for other people’s sake; sometimes because we feel ashamed or guilty. But the devil loves secrets. The devil would like us to live in shame in guilt. It is great belonging to an old, in fact a 2,000 year old, religion. Over the centuries, the Church has learned a thing or two about human beings. Confession, we have learned is good for people. We unload on the priest. He’s not our best friend, or our spouse, or our parent, there’s usually a line so there is not going to be a long conversation. We go, we get these secret things off our chest and we go on with our lives. We can ask God to forgive us and God will of course. But it is hard to let go of these things without telling someone and the priest is hearing so many, he forgets what he hears. When he tells you that you are okay, you know you are. So, this Wednesday, please come. If you don’t want to go to individual confession, that’s okay, come and support those who do and it’ll make you feel better. My friends, Christmas is a feast of families. We share memories, we share our spiritual lives and we are making new memories and new family stories. We, like John, remember that we are not the Messiah. We open ourselves to the Messiah who knows us so well, loves us so much and forgives. May we rejoice to hear the good news: “I am proud of you.” Fr. Jeff McGowan |
